Happy Mother’s Day: Our Tribute to Moms, Cars—and Moms as Cars!

Today is Mother’s Day. You didn’t forget, did you?

We don’t want you to ever forget about mom on Mother’s Day or any other mom-related occasion, so we’re going to help you always remember your mother by associating her with something else you love very much—hot rods. Stay with us here…

Chances are you have can’t-miss car shows and events on your calendar. You probably don’t forget routine maintenance and detailing on your muscle car or street machine. And you may even set your DVR to record certain car-related TV shows and race coverage. So if you want to ensure you don’t forget about Mother’s Day, logic (at least ours) says you should think of your mom as a fine automobile. You’ll never miss another important mom-related date, and you’ll probably even send her flowers every 3,000 miles.

The question is, which car best describes your mom? Here are a few options to get you started:

The ’57 Chevy
Remember when mom started your day with a hot breakfast, saw you off to school, kissed your boo-boos, and had dinner on the table when dad got home? If you do, you’ve got yourself a ’57 Chevy mom.

Your mom harkens back to the golden age of America when factories were booming, picket fences lined the streets, and America fell in love with Beaver, Wally, Ward, and June. She’s a true American classic just like the 1957 Chevy—a veritable June Cleaver on wheels.

The ‘54 F-100
When the going got tough, your mom got tougher. Perhaps your mom worked extra jobs to put you through school, give you a nice vacation, or just to make ends meet. Or maybe it was just a chore to put up with the hormone-fueled, zit-ridden version of your current self. Either way, your mom was tough, dependable, and workmanlike in her quest to raise you right.

Tough, dependable, workmanlike—that’s the 1954 Ford F-100 pickup!

The El Camino
Some mothers are hybrids—the perfect combination of mom and career woman. We’d never insult this style of mother by comparing her to a Prius, so we’ll go with a more classic, cool hybrid.

The El Camino mom walks the line perfectly between two universes—home and corporate America—just like the Elco resided in the passenger car and truck realms. It worked for the El Camino for nearly a quarter century, and it works for these moms, too.

The Porsche 911
With its sexy lines, attractive appearance, and fast, aggressive performance, the Porsche 911 is a hot little number. And even if you don’t picture your mom as the Porsche 911 type, your friends, neighbors, and acquaintances just might.

In fact, they probably have. Sorry.

The Ford Pinto
Did mom rule with an iron fist? Was she big on discipline, hot-tempered—dare we say fiery?

If mom was always the type to spontaneously combust at the first sign of misbehavior, it’s a no-brainer. She’s like one of America’s all-time most combustible cars: the Ford Pinto.

The Rolls-Royce
With an immaculate, roomy interior, superior climate control system, and power everything, the Rolls Royce is all about your comfort. The Rolls-Royce Mom—a.k.a. the Aston Martin, Bentley, or Cadillac Mom—also spoils you in every way possible.

Perhaps your doting mom still smoothes down your hair and leaves lipstick marks on your cheek. And perhaps you deserve a swift kick in the rear from the Ford Pinto Mom. We just wouldn’t recommend kicking her back—at least not without good insurance.

The Big Block Chevelle
Thanks to a big cubic inch engine and a chambered muffler, the big block-powered Chevelle was wicked, mean, overbearing, and loud. If you think this best describes your mom, you’re just a bad person.

Your mother-in-law maybe.

The Cougar
Enough said.

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Maybe your mom is a combination of more than one—or none of these at all. Which classic car best describes your mom? Share your comments.